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I decided I would hop on this month of gratitude train.  This week I’d like to focus on my bonus kids, I am so thankful for you. I would not be who I am without you. Being your stepmom has been one of the greatest blessings of my life. I could not imagine my life without you.

So I LOVE being a mom. A lot of women are all like, “motherhood does not define me.” And that’s fantastic for them, you do you boo, but I feel the opposite.
Motherhood defines so much of who I am, and I’m not ashamed or mad about that. I am a Mom, and a badass one at that. It’s who I am, without it, I am not whole. Logan and Lillyan are just as much a part of that equation as my biological kids. They are my children, and I am so blessed to be able to live out my days as their other mom.

My Lillers, My Best Lilly Friend

 

 

Lillyan I have adored you since I laid eyes on you. You were freshly 7 and one of the prettiest little girls I had ever seen.  You had these chubby little cheeks and your blue/green eyes sparkled when you would smile. Your giggle was infectious, it still is. Mason has your giggle.
Your sweetness and patience for my little 1.5-year-old Merideth melted my damn heart. You never complained or hesitated to let her be your shadow since day one. I am so grateful for the relationship the two of you have; for the true sister bond that you two share. You have always been her best Lilly friend. I cannot wait to see how your relationship grows in your adult life. I am thankful for the stellar example you set for Merideth as to what a big sister should be like.

You were so loving and enthusiastic when I first came around. You took right to me. Maybe it was all the crafts or the letting you use my makeup to do your dad’s makeup, but you became my buddy right away. I am so grateful it was not a struggle.

7 years later, I could not be prouder of the young woman you have grown up to be. You’re not a shitty teenager with a raging fucking attitude and I could not thank you enough for that. You are actually pretty chill. I’m thankful for our chats, and that you get my sense of humor. Even when you think I’m a fucking weirdo, you still laugh at me. You’re the real MVP, you make it look easy.

I love your spunk, your fire, your sense of humor. You lack a little bit of a filter when you speak ( just like your daddy) and I love that about you. You are growing to know your worth, and it’s a beautiful thing. You’re going to be an adult before I know it, and while I dread those years, I look forward to watching your story unfold. I am so thankful I get to be a part of that story.

I’m grateful for your late-night calls or texts to fill me in on the latest heartbreak or gossip. I hope you always call.  I’ll always be there to hear you out or listen to you cry or talk shit with you about the piece of shit boy who broke your heart or the fugly girl who is making your life miserable. I got you, girl. I know it’s hard sometimes, but I swear it’s worth it.

I am so thankful for the big sissy you are to Mase and Marleigh. You are never too cool to hang out with them or to let Mason follow you around and climb all over you. You are one of the biggest highlights of his week, every week.

Logan Jason. There is No One Else Like You

 

Logan, it seems like yesterday you were this spunky, silly little 4-year-old boy who had a billion questions. I love that about you, you are so inquisitive. You used to ( and still do) say the most hysterical things. Doesn’t everyone call it a bumblebee maker and a volleyball stadium? Remember when you asked if we could have a meeting of the shit kickers? lol. You are hysterical and always have us laughing. I wish I would have kept a journal of the goofy-ass things you have said over the years, it would be comedy gold.

You were not won over as easily as your sister lol. You were totally worth the effort son. Don’t get me wrong, you were always sweet and even when you didn’t love me, you always accepted me, and I am grateful for that.

You are a daddy’s boy, and you have been since I met you. I think at first you were probably not too keen on me spending so much time with your daddy. After all, he belonged to you and you wanted all of his time and affection. This was a little because you were 4 and a lotta because it’s just who you are. You Love the shit out of your people. So fiercely that part of you just does not want to share them.

You are a sensitive soul. You are not afraid to cry. Never let someone change that in you. In a world where “boys will be boys” and “real men don’t cry” it is refreshing. I am thankful for your honesty when we end up cutting through the bullshit we all find ourselves wading through sometimes and you open up and are super honest and real with your feelings. This doesn’t happen often with you, you are more reserved in that aspect than your sister, so I am grateful for those moments.

I know you weren’t exactly initially thrilled about the idea of either Mason or Marleigh, but they stole your heart and you have become a great big brother. You and your brother are Mason’s idols. He looks up to you and wants to do and be whatever you are at the time. Despite the 7 year age gap, you let him pal around with you like he’s one of the “big kids.” I’m so thankful for that. Seeing all of you together makes my heart happy.

 

Being a Stepmom Has Made My Life Complete

This is a journey I never set out to be on, but one that has been a gift that just keeps giving. I get the pleasure of parenting these two kids without the whole pregnancy/birth part, which honestly, is pretty cool.
Being a stepmom has taught me so much about patience, love, and communication. It has made me a better woman in so many ways for so many reasons. Shit I used to trip over, I walk over now. Becoming a stepmom forced me to become a grown-ass woman and I couldn’t be happier.

Step-parenting has made my life, my heart, my home so full of love. Lots of chaos, but lots of love, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Lucas and Merideth have been given the gift of another brother and sister. The boys are only 4 months apart, so It has given me the opportunity to watch my big boys play years of basketball and football TOGETHER. Added bonus, my husband was able to coach most of them, and I am able to watch from the stands with his mom, as a team. It takes a village, and mine is so blessed.

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